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( Wednesday, Jul. 01, 2009 2:33 pm )

>A review of my life, now that some hope is restored

Just accepted a job, you know, assistanting. Told Davy that it would be $31,000 (after 7 months of job searching I had despaired of getting even that, and had agreed with myself to settle for 28) and he said "Well, I guess that's above the poverty line." Hence, all happiness immediately evaporated. Ah well. He knew I had an interview next week for a decent grant writing job, however, I had to remind myself that an interview appt is far from an offer, and that I never really liked grant writing anyway.

In the meantime I am taking some classes towards knowing more about web design, and am hoping that I will finally get around to writing what will no doubt be a brilliant Charlotte Bronte fan-fiction novel. We will clearly never buy a house in our neighborhood, but then again, I don't want to. I would like to garden, but maybe next year in the community plot.

Our poor Kitty died last week, meeting some sort of accident near the curb, poor girl. I miss her terribly. There's many kittens in shelters that I've heard of recently, so perhaps we'll get one or two, although they'll never be able to touch Kitty, who was getting so mellow and understanding with us as the years went on. Especially since I've been at home all day, she and I have come to be like friends, two females napping together in the morning and at night. Poor Kitty, poor Kitty. She was a neighborhood fixture and would flop down on the sidewalk in front of passersby for attention, and loved to rub her head on the feet of her people.

I really feel more in love with Davy than ever, and more thankful for his unflagging loving good nature, and if anything Kitty's death brought us closer together. We are in the midst of a busy wedding season, but I am no closer to knowing how he and I should get married...I flip flop around, thinking about how the traditional wedding dinner/dance/ceremony performed by old man/everyone watching me/closest friends dressed alike at my whim is completely grotesque, but can't think of a decent alternative. There is my idea of a short wedding with boxed-lunches in the park, but I feel guilty excluding people and making 4 elderly grandmas sit on park benches. Also there is Catholicism, embodied in the person of his mom. Though we are in complete agreement on the need to procrastinate, we occasionally talk about which MJ song to play at the reception. It's all a bit confusing.

I kind of want to have a baby (but perhaps a kitten would do as well). Pros--Not allergic to babies. Cons--Must pass out of vagina.

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