Act natural

( Wednesday, Mar. 19, 2003 8:29 am )

>I am a young mother and a brazen hussy

Yesterday was.....hmmm. First of all, in the morning Landlady Ellie used her trickery to get me to babysit the boy in the afternoon, because she was sick. Well, she was eating nachos in her pajamas when I left to pick him up at daycare, but I suppose I take her at her word. I can't object anyway, because I have a whole lotta free time and she is a single mother with no one to help her. So anyway, guess what I had to do? Take the boy to the doctor to get his shots. I swear. It was like I was pretending to be a single mother for the day. Plus, there is nothing more frightening than a room full of fashionable mothers and upscale babies at the pediatrician's office. Never have kids, by the way. Save yourself a lot of trouble.

Then I rushed home and handed the baby off in order to have time to get ready for the dinner with Call. I forgot to mention that Matt (Pukey) heard about this little plan and so invited Juney out for din and over to his place, thus leaving me at liberty to profane the futon, etc. Big thanks to Matt.

So Call. Jeezum. Things were going weird for a while cause I was being too quiet for some reason, forcing him to fill conversational pauses with explanations of the rules of baseball and what the numbers on my contact lens package mean, etc. This is seriously how we interact. Anyway, so then picture us on the futon, watching my old The State video because there's nothing on. Still no smooching. At this point I go to the bathroom and give myself a little imaginary pep talk because it's become more than clear that I am going to have to kiss him first. So I come back, wait until the first boring sketch because he's laughing pretty hard at some of it, lean up and kiss him. Thus, the making out on the futon that I had been anticipating.

It was nice, it was nice. Frankly, the lack of iniative on his part is a good thing because he'll probably not attempt any clothing removal until I do, so that gives me entire control of whether we run the other bases and when. Like, last night, if I hadn't done anything we probably would have sat there with him rubbing my arm for another whole night, even though he was very enthusiastic about the project of swallowing my lower face once we got started.

I seriously can't tell what I feel.

I bet one thing though, I bet that Call's looking at me now and thinking, well, I'll probably get to have sex with her sometime soon. And isn't that funny, he thinks he'll be getting some finally. Boy is he barking up the wrong tree. Well, not exactly the wrong tree, because I would like to sleep with him eventually, but at least the wicked awkward sex tree.

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