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( Tuesday, Dec. 23, 2003 8:03 pm )

>Error-proof girl

Tonight I started and finished all my Christmas shopping; I'm feeling very positive about it. Except for Call's stuff, of course, which I purchased in a timely and inspired fashion weeks ago. Everyone else's presents are fairly OK, except of course for Juney's present, which is a painting that I've only put in an hour of work on, so that is crappy. Eh, Christmas. Whatever. The effect of a retail Christmas on me is that I just don't care about the season. Work has actually been mostly fun, and I leave for CT tomorrow right after I finish Big Chain Wage Slavery.

In other news, I was going to share with you my very detailed and complicated thoughts on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, specifically the queers themselves, but instead I offer you the drama of my past week: Pregnancy Paranoia '03.

Drama is actually kind of over-stating the case. And so is Pregnancy. And Paranoia. But anyway, I have been in possession of the Pill for a while, but have just been waiting for my period to start it. Meanwhile, several days ago, I may have had a little sex with a certain person whose name starts with a C, and I may have indeed allowed this sex to occur without a prophylactic of any sort. How very stupid. At the time, however, I was thinking of the words of the doctor at my recent GYN visit, who speculated that I might not be ovulating at all, usually. So I was all carefree and unconcerned until the event was over with, after which I proceeded to mildly freak out and start to hate first Call and then myself.

So the next day I proceeded to my local Planned Parenthood for emergency contraception, still feeling very guilty and kind of mad that Call was probably still asleep while I had to go to a clinic on my lunch break. Not only that, but there was a high school-type couple making out in the Planned Parenthood office, which, really, is the height of sluttishness. Immediately upon getting the pills, though, I began to feel a lot better, and also began thinking "hey, if I don't take these til tomorrow, I can also be irresponsible with my boyfriend tonight," which is indeed what happened.

I wound up taking them with the recommended Dramamine to reduce nausea, and it made me sleep for about 16 hours straight on Monday.

So that is my little tale of woe for the week. Merry Christmas. The thing is, I always assume that there are certain things I don't do, like be irresposible about sex or have to take the morning after pill--things that, admittedly, I have looked down on other girls for doing--and yet, when the opportunity came, I did it. I swear it will never happen again, but it's just that, at the time, it felt practically like an experiment (Call felt the same way, I think), like...what will happen if I do something bad? And the answer is, I will enjoy it a lot and then feel very guilty.

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