Act natural

( Sunday, May. 12, 2002 11:32 am )

>Pretend in love with the pretend-boyfriend

Another Nathan-centric entry. Please don't hate me. I really have no other choice since I spent the entire day with him yesterday, and probably had the best time I've ever had in a long time. In part I have to credit this to my fine, fine date idea, a date idea whose singular greatness will be remembered for years to come. But mostly, it's just due to the canned wonderfulness that is....that guy. Also, at the end I'm going to put a slightly disgusting but interesting scientific conclusion I've come to, so if you're a doctor or something, send me some feedback.

OK, so first of all I went to pick him up at his apartment and immediately he made me sit down in the kitchen and said he was going to play for me (he plays the guitar and sings). And, well, I was somewhat reluctant, because this is not the first time someone I know has wanted me to listen to them play and sing, because most people play the guitar, and most people write songs, but then you have to listen to fitful strumming and angsty lyrics about somebody's parents' divorce. So I'm wary. And I admit that another part of me was like "ooh, perhaps he's written a song about me!!" Because I'm very self-centered. But he just wanted to show me the kind of stuff he does, so he played two little things, one he wrote and one somewhat bluesy one... and holy crap. Holy crap. I thought I was going to start to cry there in the kitchen because he is amazing. This perfect voice, and beautiful playing...just....holy crap. I can't believe he knows how to do that. Credit where credit is due: this man is a musician f'real.

After he nearly moved me to tears, I forced him into my death trap Toyota Camry (not really. It's a hot rod. And he went willingly). And we proceeded to the diner for breakfast foods, and then to this cool place that had huge sculptures on some very beautiful old farmland. We walked around this place for hours, sat in the grass and kissed, sat on a rock in a stream (and kissed), and actually managed to talk about some serious things. Also, he decided to confess to me that he's a smoker, which I swear to you, I knew almost immediately when I met him, but didn't want to seem like a crazy person by asking him. You know, like maybe his breath naturally smells like tobacco; what do I know about men? So anyway, he was keeping this from me because I'm a non-smoker, which is impressive because we have had some long dates in the past, with very limited opportunities to sneak away for a cigarette. The only thing I don't understand is why he put non-smoker in his ad, long before he even knew of me. Very peculiar. But anyway, I didn't care.

On the way back we stopped briefly at the Wendy's drive-through (very exciting), and just let me give you a little vingette of the drive back: he solicitously hands me the frosty we're sharing, and unprovokedly nuzzles my bare shoulder with a kind of grrr-sound effect.

Then, dangerously, we headed back to my house. Ruby and Prissy are both gone for the weekend, but I knew Stinky would still be home. To Nathan's credit, he is so good and polite around her, though we both mock her when she's out of earshot. Anyway, today was very typical on the weirdness scale, because as we got in we realized that Stinky was blasting her medieval music mp3s, such hits as "If I had a million ducats" (haha, get it??) and "Do virgins taste better than those who are not?" and other lovely songs that last about 10 minutes and are about dragons and have pennywhistle solos. That was pretty hilarious, but she did stop eventually.

Nathan and I had a fantastic time hanging around the house for about three hours, literally rolling on my floor and playing with my toys (slinky, ball, etc) and tickling each other and giggling like crazy people. I can't even believe I could have that much fun with him, just being so entirely silly. We moved the fun up to the loft (where we keep a futon and little else) too, where I took his retractable pen and tattooed him with an "N" on his thumb, and he wrote my initial on mine. Fun fun fun.

Brief interlude: dinner at Vietnamese place. Delicious.

Back to my apartment.

Sneak into the construction site across the street.

Smoke a cigarette.

Adjourn to the couch, for such activities as beer-drinking, foot massage, smoochy-smoochy (new milestone: his hand up my shirt--but at the back not front), and, I kid you not, falling asleep. He fell asleep lying with me on the couch. It was sweet and nice, I thought, and I didn't want to wake him. He may have slept for an hour before I was uncomfortable (overheating in my sweater), plus I sort of was starting to miss him, in the manner of a three-year-old: hey, wake up and play with me. I moved my arm along his back and he woke up instantly, and shot up and sort of walked around the coffee table, extremely disoriented. I felt a little bad, that he pretty much woke up, saw me, and was scared. But oh well, he was unconscious, and that was probably the most intimate thing we've ever done. I keep wanting him to, like, pretend we're in love and have been forever, so that he can wake up in a smoochy mood, but what can I say? It's only been three weeks.

Um, OK, so I may have invited him to stay the night, sort of. He didn't though. I knew I shouldn't have, but hey, he was asleep.....eh, I don't know. Obviously, if you had the choice: spoon me in my tiny institutional bed, or return to your own comfortable house to jerk off and sleep in peace, which would you choose?

Anyway, so some more kissing later, I drove him home. That was truly just an amazing day from start to finish. It's not that I'm not second-guessing myself and him anymore, because I always am, but I can recognize that things are about as perfect for me right now as they can get. We may be going grocery shopping together tonight--possibly a bad idea because I'm always really depressed at Stop & Shop on Sunday nights.

On to my medical break-through--I got my period last night, for real, after really not having had it for a long, long time. And I'm just wondering if it could be due to the whole Nathan thing, because I'm either more relaxed and euphoric, or more aroused, or maybe because I can finally feel like a normal person/woman. So, thank you to Nathan for making me feel like I'm not that one untouched infant in the P.C.U. anymore.

Word to your mother.

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